Surrender - Loving, Trusting and Obeying God
I gave my heart to Jesus twenty years ago but for many years I struggled to die to myself and to obey the teachings of Christ. Oh, I professed with my mouth that Jesus was Lord, but truth be told it was and still is a daily decision to surrender my will and pick up my cross and follow Christ. Surrendering to God isn't easy and anyone who says it is likely has not entered the narrow gate that Jesus talked about (Matthew 7:13). After all this time of believing in Christ, the human in me can still love my life more than God. It's been a constant battle to die to my flesh because for many years I identified more with my life story, my past pain, my hurts, my regrets, my disappointments and sorrows of this life. I realize now how early trauma in my life really affected my ability to see the good God had placed in me. For a lot of my life I focused on the negative parts of my story, I saw myself as flawed and broken, which I was. Now, of course, it wasn't just negative thing...